and I don’t even know why. I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do. Seven and a half years of this is getting ooollldd. I’m such a fucking joke.
You always break me down to my lowest point.
I don’t even know what’s real anymore.
Why can’t this just stop?
I’m kind of freaking out. I’ve haven’t told many people what I want to do after I graduate just because I am nervous about seeming like I’m crazy. Or worse, if it turns out that I fail, I will look like a dumbass. I’ve had a hard time keeping my mouth shut though because I’m so excited about it, and now I’m freaking out.
What if I’m making a complete idiot out of myself?
Meeting with a certain advisor to see if its even possible for me to do what i really want to do. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared. If he says no i may just lose it.